KindHow

Gift Amounts

Wedding gift calculator

Tell us how you know the couple and what going will cost you, and you get one amount — plus the bills it comes to.

Every line behind that number is shown, and each one is marked either sourced or house judgment. Disagree with one and change it.

Your answers

Answer whichever apply — the amount updates as you go.

Your situation
$2002×$100

The usual for a close friend is $200. Nothing about your situation moves it. Give $200.

Why that muchAmount
Baseline for a close friendSourcedThe Knot puts this tier at $150–$250 and recommends $200.$200
Adds up to$200Rounded to an amount you can hand over$200

Informational only. This is a model, not advice, and it has no opinion about your budget — give less without apology if that’s where you are. Baselines from The Knot — How Much to Spend on a Wedding Gift; every judgment line is ours and is marked as such.

Methodology

This tool runs the Kindhow Scale, version 1.0: a baseline drawn from a named publication, plus a stack of adjustments you select. Each adjustment is tagged sourced when a publication backs that exact figure, and house judgment when the reasoning is ours. There is no third tag, and no line on this site is unlabelled.

The formula

baseline           The Knot's figure for how well you know the couple
  × region         BEA regional price parity, as a share of the US average
  + plus-one       half the baseline again
  + wedding party  flat
  − not attending  a quarter of the baseline
  − travel         8% of what getting there costs you, capped
  ─────────────
  = subtotal
  ÷ group size     if several of you are going in together
  ≈ rounded        to $5 / $10 / $25 steps, by size (lib/giveable.js)

Baselines — sourced

The Knot publishes a recommended figure and a range for each tier of relationship. We take the recommended figure verbatim; the range is shown so you can see how much latitude their own guidance allows. For context, their most recent guest study puts the average gift across all guests at $150, and Zola’s 2026 First Look Report puts it at $130.

RelationshipThe Knot’s rangeBaseline
Distant relative, or a friend of a friend$50–$100$75
Coworker or acquaintance$100–$150$100
Extended family$100–$150$150
Good friend$100–$200$175
Close friend$150–$250$200
Best friend, or immediate family$250+$250

Adjustments — house judgment

None of these figures come from a study, because no study measures them. They are our reasoning, published here in full so you can argue with them. If you think the plus-one line should be double rather than half again, you now know exactly which number to disagree with — which is more than any other page on this subject will give you.

AdjustmentOur reasoningEffect
Plus-oneOne gift covers you both — Emily Post is explicit that your date does not give separately. But the couple invited you, so it is not two of the same gift.+50%
Wedding partyThe Knot measures the wedding party giving more than other guests. The size of the premium is ours, kept small because you have already bought the dress or the suit.+$25
Not attendingEmily Post still expects a gift when you decline, and says you need not spend what you would have. How much less is our number.−25%
Travel you’re absorbingShowing up at your own expense is part of what you gave. Capped at 25% of the baseline so a destination wedding cannot reduce the gift to nothing.−8% of the trip
Where the wedding isThe index is real and cited below. Applying it to gifts is not: no publication has studied whether wedding gifts track regional price levels. We think they should, so this line is tagged as ours.±10%
FloorBelow this an amount stops reading as a gift, so nothing the model produces goes under it.$25

Regional price level

The bands come from the Bureau of Economic Analysis’ Regional Price Parities for 2024, released in February 2026. The US average is 100 by construction. The states named in each band are the actual top and bottom of that year’s table.

BandPublished 2024 valuesWe use
A high-cost state — California, Hawaii, New JerseyCalifornia 110.7, Hawaii 110.0, New Jersey 108.8110
About the US averagethe US is 100 by definition100
A low-cost state — Arkansas, Mississippi, IowaArkansas 86.9, Mississippi 87.0, Iowa 87.887

What this tool will not do

  • It will not tell you to cover your plate. The idea that a gift should equal what the couple spent hosting you is repeated everywhere and endorsed by no etiquette authority — the Emily Post Institute declines to recommend it. Our travel line runs the opposite direction.
  • It has no opinion about your budget. There is no line here telling you to be more generous, and no comparison to what other guests give. If money is tight, give less; the arithmetic is not a verdict.
  • It is US-only. Every baseline and index here is American. Wedding gift conventions elsewhere are often entirely different — in several traditions cash in specific denominations is the rule, not a fallback — and this model does not represent them.
  • It does not know your family. A standing arrangement, a gift you were given at your own wedding, or a couple who have asked for nothing all beat anything a model can compute.

Sources

Informational only, not professional advice. The Kindhow Scale is a published model, not a standard, and the lines marked house judgment are our reasoning and nothing more. Last reviewed: August 2026. Scale version 1.0. Figures that come from a publication are re-checked against their source on a monthly cycle; when one moves, the version number moves with it.

Frequently asked questions

How much should I give for a wedding gift in 2026?

The Knot's most recent guest study puts the average wedding gift at $150, and Zola's 2026 First Look Report puts it at $130, with most guests spending between $100 and $150. Those are averages across every kind of guest, though. This calculator starts from The Knot's figure for your specific relationship to the couple — $100 for a coworker, $200 for a close friend, $250 for your closest people — and then adjusts for the things that actually change the number.

Do I have to cover the cost of my plate?

No, and this calculator will never tell you to. "Covering your plate" is a widely repeated rule with no etiquette authority behind it — the Emily Post Institute explicitly declines to recommend it. What the couple spent on catering is a decision they made about their wedding, not an invoice for your attendance. The travel line in this tool works the other way round: if getting there cost you money, that is part of what you gave, so the amount goes down rather than up.

Do I still send a gift if I am not going to the wedding?

Yes, if you were invited and you are close enough to the couple that the invitation meant something. Emily Post's guidance is that a gift is still expected when you decline, but that you need not spend what you would have if you had attended. Our model takes 25% off the baseline in that case — that specific figure is our judgment, not theirs, and the tool labels it that way.

If I am bringing a date, do we give twice as much?

No. Emily Post is clear that couples attending together send one gift, and your date is not expected to give separately. But doubling is too much, because the relationship driving the amount is yours, not theirs — the couple invited you. This model adds 50% of the baseline for a plus-one. Half again, not double. That is a house judgment and the tool says so on the line itself.

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