Tipping
Holiday tipping calculator
Tick the people who look after you through the year and you get the December list — a name, an amount, and the cash it comes to.
Every amount sits inside a range The Emily Post Institute actually publishes, and the mail carrier line follows the federal rule that says no cash at all. Each line is marked sourced or house judgment.
Set aside $195: $175 in cash across 4 people, plus $20 in gifts, because your mail carrier is not allowed to take money. The biggest single line is your housekeeper or cleaner at $110.
| Why that much | Amount |
|---|---|
| Housekeeper or cleanerHouse judgmentEmily Post says “up to one week’s pay” — $140 in your case. Taking 75% of that ceiling is our call, not theirs, because they look after you all year. | $110 |
| Trash or recycling collector (×2)SourcedThe Emily Post Institute publishes “$10-30 each.” We land at $20 each because they look after you all year. | +$40 |
| BarberHouse judgmentEmily Post says “up to one haircut” — $35 in your case. Taking 75% of that ceiling is our call, not theirs, because they look after you all year. | +$25 |
| Mail carrierSourcedA federal rule, not an opinion: USPS carriers may accept a gift worth $20 or less per occasion, and never cash, checks or gift cards. $50 is the most one customer may give in a year. | +$20 |
Informational only. These are amounts, not obligations. Emily Post says plainly that holiday tips are optional and that your budget and your relationship govern — skip a line, halve a line, and nobody is owed an explanation. Published ranges from The Emily Post Institute — Holiday Tipping Guide; the $20 carrier limit is USPS policy. Every judgment line is ours and is marked as such.
Methodology
This tool runs the Kindhow Scale, version 1.0, in its list form. The wedding calculator starts from one baseline and argues with it; this one has no single baseline, because the question does not have one. What it has is a row per person, and each row is tagged sourced when a publication backs that exact figure and house judgment when the reasoning is ours.
The formula
for each person on your list:
published range Emily Post's own $ range for that role
± where you live BEA price parity, as a nudge inside the range
± how the year went first year / regular / years with you
→ a figure still inside their range sourced
published ceiling "up to one week's pay", "up to one haircut"
× 50 / 75 / 100% how the year went judgment
→ 100% is their ceiling exactly sourced
no-cash roles mail carrier, package driver
→ $20 as a gift, fixed, USPS policy sourced
─────────────
= cash total + gift total = the whole list
each line rounded to a bill you can put in a card (lib/giveable.js)Published ranges — sourced
The Emily Post Institute’s Holiday Tipping Guide prices these roles three different ways, and this tool keeps all three rather than flattening them into one percentage. Some roles have a published dollar range. Some are pegged to something you already pay — a week’s wages, one haircut. Two are not tipped in money at all. The middle column is their wording; the last is what this tool computes at the middle setting, in an average-cost part of the country.
| Role | What Emily Post publishes | We compute |
|---|---|---|
| Live-in nanny or au pair | Up to one week’s pay and a gift from your child(ren). | 75% of one week’s pay |
| Regular babysitter | Up to one evening’s pay and a small gift from your child(ren). | 75% of one evening’s pay |
| Day care staff | A gift from you or $25-$70 for each staff member. | $50 |
| Housekeeper or cleaner | Up to the amount of one week’s pay and/or a small gift. | 75% of one week’s pay |
| Dog walker | Up to one week’s pay or a gift. | 75% of one week’s pay |
| Pet groomer | Up to the cost of one session or a gift. | 75% of one session |
| Doorman | $15-80. $15 or more each for multiple doormen, or a gift. | $50 |
| Building superintendent | $20-80 or a gift. | $50 |
| Garage attendant | $10-30 or a small gift. | $20 |
| Trash or recycling collector | $10-30 each. | $20 |
| Yard or garden worker | $20-50 each. | $35 |
| Pool cleaner | Up to the cost of one cleaning to be split among the crew. | 75% of one cleaning |
| Barber | Up to the cost of one haircut or a gift. | 75% of one haircut |
| Salon staff | Up to the cost of one salon visit divided for each staff member. | 75% of one salon visit |
| Personal trainer | Up to the cost of one session or a gift. | 75% of one session |
| Newspaper delivery | $10-30 or a small gift. | $20 |
| Mail carrier | No cash, no checks, no gift cards — a gift worth $20 or less. | $20, never cash |
| Package delivery driver | A small gift in the $20 range. Most delivery companies discourage or prohibit cash gifts. | $20, never cash |
Where the judgment is
One control moves the whole list, and it does two different jobs depending on how the role is priced. For a role with a published range it picks a point inside that range, so the figure is always one Emily Post publishes — those lines stay tagged sourced. For a role priced as up to something you pay, only the ceiling is theirs; taking a fraction of it is our inference, so those lines are tagged house judgment at anything below the top setting. That distinction is the whole reason the two tags exist.
| Setting | Inside a published range | Against a published ceiling |
|---|---|---|
| First year, or now and then | 15% of the way up | 50% of the ceiling |
| Regular, all year round | 50% of the way up | 75% of the ceiling |
| Years with you, and they went out of their way | 90% of the way up | 100% of the ceiling |
Where you live
The bands come from the Bureau of Economic Analysis’ Regional Price Parities for 2024, and shift you up or down within each published range — never outside it. A state ten points above the US average moves you a fifth of the way up. This is our inference, not BEA’s: no publication has studied whether holiday tips track regional price levels.
It deliberately does not touch the roles pegged to what you already pay. A salon visit in San Francisco is already a San Francisco price, and applying a regional index on top of it would count the same thing twice.
| Band | Published 2024 values | We use |
|---|---|---|
| A high-cost state — California, Hawaii, New Jersey | California 110.7, Hawaii 110.0, New Jersey 108.8 | 110 |
| About the US average | the US is 100 by definition | 100 |
| A low-cost state — Arkansas, Mississippi, Iowa | Arkansas 86.9, Mississippi 87.0, Iowa 87.8 | 87 |
The mail carrier is not a judgment call
Every other line on this page is guidance you may argue with. This one is federal policy, and the person it constrains is not you. USPS policy is that carriers “are permitted to accept a gift worth $20 or less from a customer per occasion, such as Christmas,” that “no employee may accept more than $50 worth of gifts from any one customer in any one calendar year period,” and that “cash and cash equivalents, such as checks or gift cards that can be exchanged for cash, must never be accepted in any amount.”
So that line does not move when you change the settings, and it is counted separately from your cash total. A gift card that can only be spent at one shop is a gift; a Visa gift card is cash and has to be refused. Private couriers are not covered by the same rule, but most of them have their own policy against cash, which is why this tool treats them the same way.
What this tool will not do
- It will not tell you that any of this is required. Emily Post’s own guide says these are not rules, and that tipping is optional unless it is written into a contract. Untick anyone. The list is yours.
- It has no opinion about your budget. There is no nudge here toward being more generous and no comparison to what your neighbours give. If this year is tight, give less, or give a note.
- It does not cover teachers. Teachers and other public employees are a separate question with a different answer — cash is usually inappropriate and many districts publish a hard cap on what a teacher may accept. That needs its own tool, not a row on this one.
- It is US-only. The ranges are American and the carrier rule is federal. End-of-year tipping customs elsewhere are frequently different and sometimes absent entirely.
- It does not know your building. A staff fund everyone contributes to, a super who fixed your boiler on Christmas Eve, or a doorman you have known for fifteen years all beat anything a model can compute.
Sources
- The Emily Post Institute — Holiday Tipping Guide — the published range or ceiling for every role on the list.
- The Emily Post Institute — Holiday Tips vs. Holiday Gifts — that a holiday tip is cash for regular, direct service; that teachers and government employees get a gift instead; and that the whole thing is optional.
- USPS Postal Bulletin — Employee Tipping and Gift-Receiving Policy — the $20 per-occasion limit, the $50 annual limit, and the ban on cash and cash equivalents.
- USPS — Ethics FAQs, Gifts from Outside Sources — the same limits restated in the Postal Service’s current ethics FAQ.
- U.S. Bureau of Economic Analysis — Regional Price Parities, 2024 — the regional price bands.
Informational only, not professional advice. The Kindhow Scale is a published model, not a standard, and the lines marked house judgment are our reasoning and nothing more. The USPS limits are the one exception on this page: those are policy, and they are quoted rather than interpreted. Last reviewed: August 2026. Scale version 1.0. Figures that come from a publication are re-checked against their source on a monthly cycle; when one moves, the version number moves with it.
Frequently asked questions
How much do you tip your mail carrier at Christmas?
You do not tip them at all, and this is the one line on the list that is a rule rather than an opinion. USPS policy says a letter carrier may accept a gift worth $20 or less per occasion, may accept no more than $50 from any one customer in a calendar year, and may never accept cash, checks, money orders or gift cards that can be exchanged for cash — Visa and Amex gift cards included. A $20 tin of something, a coffee shop card that cannot be cashed out, or a written note are all fine. An envelope with $50 in it puts your carrier in a position they have to refuse.
Who are you actually supposed to tip at the holidays?
The Emily Post Institute's holiday guide covers the people who serve you regularly and directly through the year: nannies and babysitters, day care staff, housekeepers, dog walkers and groomers, doormen, superintendents, garage attendants, trash and recycling crews, yard workers, pool cleaners, barbers and salon staff, personal trainers, and newspaper delivery. Two groups are deliberately outside it — teachers and government employees, who should get a gift rather than cash, and often have a workplace rule capping what they may accept at all.
Is holiday tipping mandatory?
No. Emily Post is unusually direct about this: holiday tips and gifts "are optional (unless part of a written contract) and the kind of gift is dependent on your budget and relationship to the provider," and the guide states outright that "these are not rules." This calculator produces amounts, not obligations. A cheaper year is a cheaper year, and a written note to someone you cannot tip this December is a real thing to give.
How much do you tip a doorman at Christmas?
The Emily Post Institute publishes $15 to $80, with $15 or more each where a building has several doormen. That range is wide because it is doing a lot of work: a first year in a small building sits near the bottom, and years of a doorman signing for your packages in an expensive city sits near the top. At the middle setting this tool lands on $50 each, and it multiplies by how many doormen you name rather than splitting one amount between them.
Related tools
Which wedding vendors expect a tip, which already have gratuity written into the contract, and what each one gets. The “did I pay this already?” question — answered with the IRS’ own line between a tip and a service charge.
Open tool →What a teacher gift costs, per child and as a class-wide group share — against the gift-value cap the district actually publishes, which is the part nobody checks.